We were both party animals, many nights spent out in pubs and clubs both before and after we got together as a couple. Both of us drank, but things never got nasty, on the contrary: we might have done some very silly things, but nothing that didn’t result in fits of giggles.
Sadly alongside the changes in behaviour I noticed after the birth of our son, my husband became more withdrawn. He had always been a PC gamer, but the internet allowed these games to be played online, with other gamers from around the world.
He would increasingly spend most of his evenings upstairs in the office, sometimes even leaving guests who had come over for dinner because he had an online gaming session booked in advance with others.
Whether the alcohol consumption became higher because no one was there to notice how much he was consuming or this was independently increasing because of his mental state, I have no idea. Over the space of about 3 years, it had gone from a cup of tins of lager to a whole 6 pack of beer and a bottle and half of wine.
The kids noticed as well (finding the empty bottles piled by the side of the house in the morning) and it scared them.
I can remember coming home from a meeting in London one night to be picked up by him at the train station and it was obvious that not only had he already been drinking quite a bit (slurred words), but he had also made the children come in the car with him. When we got home, our son ran upstairs to his room and later said to me “I thought we were all going to die in the car”…
If you have noticed that your partner’s intake of alcohol is increasing and need to talk, please reach out to us here. If you’re more comfortable doing this one on one, then PM me.
