We’ve all been there. The day’s gone sideways, your inbox is breeding like rabbits, the neighbour has taken up vacuuming at midnight again, and your boss just ended a meeting with “The pivot starts Monday.” You close your laptop, sighing the sigh of a thousand weary souls, and whisper to no one in particular: “I need something stronger.” And by something stronger, you don’t mean a lemon and ginger herbal tea.
When life throws a stress-shaped anvil at your face, your brain kicks off a chemical firework show. Cortisol, adrenaline, and other stress hormones get busy trying to help you fight, flee, or, if you’re British, make a passive-aggressive cup of tea and pretend everything’s fine – stiff upper lip and all that!
But these hormones don’t just leave quietly. They linger. They stew. And after a full day of cortisol soup, your brain starts craving a shortcut to feeling better, namely, dopamine, the brain’s “ooh yes, that feels good, give me more” chemical.
Your body is basically screaming, “Give me a hit of happy – NOW !! Cue: booze, cake, retail therapy, or an 11-hour Netflix binge that ends with you waking up at 0400h with a crick in your neck.
And yes, reaching for “something stronger” does work, temporarily. Alcohol, for instance, boosts dopamine and GABA (a calming neurotransmitter), giving you that warm, fuzzy “Ahhh, I’m no longer need to send death glares at the laundry basket” feeling.
But as any seasoned stress-drinker or emotional snacker knows, that artificial high comes with a hangover, literal or metaphorical. The next morning, your body’s still trying to mop up the chemical mess you made, and now you’re hungover, grumpy, tired, and have to drag yourself out of bed to get Daisy to her dance class by 0900h…
Not only does “something stronger” fail to fix the problem, but it might also borrow today’s wellbeing to pay off yesterday’s stress bill.
Using something stronger to deal with stress is like sticking your finger in a leaking dam. For a moment, it seems like it’s working. But you’re one sneeze away from being flattened by a wall of emotional water. The leak’s still there. You’re just… slightly drunk about it now. What we really need is to find the leak.
Maybe it’s the job. Maybe it’s burnout. Maybe it’s the fact you haven’t had a conversation with someone real who cares about you in weeks. These things won’t be solved by wine, whisky, or whimsically purchasing an air fryer which will never come out of its box. These things need time. They need honesty. And sometimes, they need help.
So the next time stress strikes and you’re feeling the urge to reach for something stronger, try to pause. Take a breath (a real one, not a sarcastic huff). Text a friend. Call your mum. Reach out to us. We’re not therapists, but we are human beings who know what it’s like to want to dive headfirst into a tub of double chocolate cookie dough and watch repeats of “Emily in Paris”
You don’t have to “handle it” alone. And you definitely don’t have to do it with a gin in one hand whilst you doom scroll across all those perfectly airbrushed photos online. Let’s try to help you start talking, not topping up.
Got your own finger-in-the-dam moment? Need a stronger plan than that bottle of Sauvignon Blanc ? We’re here. No judgement and as the lyrics to this song go: “something that don’t ask questions”…
Photo by Alexandra Luniel
