Thinking back, how many times do you remember all the details of someone praising you or doing something nice versus something from your past that is more negative?
I ask this because I recently found a diary from my last few months at school. In it, I’ve kept a single rose in transparent cellophane paper, a present from a guy called John who had obviously come up to my room in the 6th form block (he had got permission from the husband of one of my school teachers, who taught at his school and made him promise he would behave). Now for the life of me, I can’t put to a face to him other then remembering he was tall and quite a hunk.
But I can still remember the face of one of the older boys at my primary school taking a fountain pen I had dropped in the play area and throwing it across the courtyard as far as he could.
I have learnt that there is a science bias in us towards the recall of negative things which makes sense in term of a human survival thing: remember the fruit that made your friend sick and die so you can make sure no one ever eats those same red berries again.
However, I am not sure how it’s in our best interests from a mental health perspective to recall bad things from our past that make us depressed or anxious about the future. Surely this works against us?
How can we get around this issue so that more people feel better about themselves?
In my case, thinking about the pen incident, does this explain my collection of fountain pens and different coloured inks? But then again, my father always wrote with a pen and ink so who knows?
Do you have any bad childhood memories that you feel may still be affecting you now?
