There are various interpretations of this song, but I’ll focus on the one where sometimes people find it hard to open up about how they feel about each other, something I’ve been asked about this week by more than one person.
Yes it requires us to be vulnerable and it’s hard to take rejection, but there is equally no point in investing time with someone who isn’t on the same page. I know this requires looking at things in a different way, but moving on from something where you’re both in different cars is the best thing in the long run.
Otherwise you could end up driving past a person who would be far more suitable because you are focussing on someone who is not interested in you, basically on a different road.
Equally you may be on the same road, but you’re in the Aston Martin in the fast lane and they are in the 2CV in the slow lane. Then you can decide if you need to pull into a service station and let them catch up.
So it’s about having those honest conversations a few weeks into a new/newish connection; it’s never too early if you’ve been out a few times and just want to know where things are going because you feel the connection may have potential. This applies in particular to anyone who has recently come out of a relationship.
- Have you got over your previous relationship?
- Are you pretty much healed from what has happened to you in the past?
- Are you ready to invest time in someone or just want something casual?
The inability to have a real conversation about how a connection feels can end up in one party deciding to walk away, sometimes because they have mis-interpreted something the other did or messaged in the wrong way. We should also guard against reading too much of “what we want” into dating.
We can also allow our previous bad experiences to influence how we feel about someone we don’t know very well. It’s also really important to not allow something negative going on at work or with our family to affect how we perceive others. Guilty this week of doing this, the catalyst being asked to do something that I considered to be extremely controlling/shocking and ended up with me feeling like a piece of meat…
I allowed this to make me push someone away (the kiss off in his words) in a flippant and disrespectful manner because I judged him to be in the same vein as the other guy. Then realised how stupid I had been to allow that to happen; my life felt like it was missing a wheel. Cue 2 days of wobbles and a few tears before he rang back.
Yes there is something about you; thank you for understanding how I felt at the time and forgiving me; and yes it was one of the better decisions in your life …😝
PS. Is £30k / year the going rate for a weekly grace and favour evening ?
