Someone reached back out to me recently after almost two years. He explained that he had stopped chatting back then because he had started going out with someone in the real world and didn’t feel it was fair on her. What surprised me most was his honesty when he admitted he had been hiding very strong feelings for me, even though he was all the way on the other side of the planet in Australia. It felt surreal, as if no time had passed at all, even though whole chapters of life had been lived in between.
That is one of the quirks of human connection. People come and go from our lives for countless reasons, often dictated by timing, circumstance or simple geography. Sometimes it hurts when they drift away, other times it feels natural, but the remarkable thing is how easily some of those bonds can be rekindled. One emoji, a single comment in a chat or ten minutes on a call can carry us right back to where we left off. The laughter feels familiar, the rhythm of conversation picks up as though it was only yesterday, and the comfort is instantly there again.
A close rugby mate of mine reminded me of this last year. On the very day he was due to carry the Olympic torch, even though we hadn’t spoken for several months, he messaged me. Of all the moments in his life to pause and reach out, he chose one that was hugely significant. That small act took me straight back to the close friendship we had built in the late 2000s. It showed that true bonds don’t fade with silence, they simply rest until someone lights the spark again.
Psychologists call this phenomenon “social reconnection.” Our brains store emotional memory differently from factual memory. With certain people, the emotional trace never fades. When we reconnect, those same neural pathways light up again, bringing forward all the warmth, affection and shared history in an instant. It explains why we can smile so widely when someone from our past appears again, even after years. The relationship may have been on pause, but the feeling remains alive.
Think of old school friends, former colleagues, or people we once spent long nights talking to when the world felt wide open. Maybe life pulled everyone in different directions, yet one random message in the middle of a Tuesday zoom call can unlock it all. It is a reminder that while we cannot carry every connection with us in the same way, the ones that matter are stored deep in us, waiting for the right spark.
So we become grateful for the past, for all the moments that shaped us, and for the fact that some people still choose to pause and share their time with us. Whether it is a full conversation or simply a small gesture, it is ace to know that threads of connection can always be rewoven. The beauty lies not in how often we speak, but in how easily we find one another again when we do.
